Sunday, October 21, 2012
Week 8 Theme
I awoke on the couch, opening my eyes slowly as they got used to the light. All I could see at first was the huge camo comforter wrapped around me like a cocoon, bunched up so high that I can hardly see over. I push it down with my hands to reveal the dining room. It was empty, the big wooden table spotless, no one had eaten yet and I couldn't here anyone over near the sink. I peered to the right of where I was laying, past the fridge and the space heater and I see that the TV across from me was not on. The house was very still and quiet, every one must still be sleeping. There was a calmness in the air but I sensed that someone should be getting up any minute. I turned my head hard to the right to check on Ben who was at the other end of the of the big blue wrap-around to make sure he was still sleeping. The morning sun shining through the cracks of the curtains blinded me as I looked over to him. He was awake, just sitting uncomfortably in silence trying his hardest to fall back asleep. He just had surgery so he was propped up with his eyes fluttering open and closed in one of the reclining seats. All his pillows that he had brought home from the hospital were strewn on the curve of the couch between him and I, along with extra blankets and a chip bag left over from the night before. On the arm rest next to him was a bottle of Tylenol, water bottles, and a half empty container of brownies; his survival items for his couch ridden recovery. I look back to him from the clutter in front of me and see that he is awake and struggling to reposition himself without hurting his shoulder any more. I can see the pain in his face as he slowly leans forward in the seat using the foot rest to pull his body up. I feel bad for him and want to ask if I can help, but I know he'll say there is nothing I can do so i let him go about his business. Behind him the bathroom door is cracked and the light still on. I should get up to shut it off now that the sun is up because it was only being used as a night light. Instead I stay wrapped in my warm cocoon surrounded by the calm and coolness of the house with only the sound of the creaking couch keeping me from falling back asleep.
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Jordan! Nice job! This kind of assignment really works for you--it steers you toward being a camera and away from being a commentator, and the writing really snaps to attention with all that picture-creating detail and with a perfect vignette ending.
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