Prompt 50 Week 10

We are hugging goodbye for the last time. It is so sad, and I want to cry but I refuse to. I refuse to because he doesn't deserve my tears. This is like a break from chains for me. I will finally feel free from the baggage and drama that I as linked to because of him. I should be happy in this moment almost, but saddened  by the the happy memories that I am leaving behind. However the bad outweighed the good. This goodbye is liberating.
***

Summer 2012, the best we had shared together. I worked my butt off waiting tables, but the money and tips were so worth it. He had a landscaping job and also made a lot of money. We weren't right on each other all the time, or seeing each other every day. We gave each other space and saw each other only when we could. This made the time we spent together amazing and so much more worth it. Finally I felt as though we could be perfect, that we were in a good groove and we were headed in a positive direction.
***

January 2012 was a rough patch, but not one we couldn't get through. My problem was that I put too much faith in him and trusted him more than I should. I was always thinking he'd change and not be shady and lie. I was mistaken, but for some reason I wanted to try again. The thought of him being with someone else killed me. I should've known then that that wasn't a good reason for me to give him another chance. I wanted to see if he could prove me and everyone else wrong, I wanted him to change.
***

Freshman year of college. We were so happy yet there was so much that I kept replaying in the back of my mind. I knew he was lying, about a lot of things for that matter. However, I didn't want to believe it. I wanted us to be good. He treated me so well, but he still lied and we still fought. I was confused and he took advantage of my trust. I didn't know it at the time, even though I thought it may be true I refused to believe that he could be so snake-like. I continued to push away the unhappy thoughts of what happened in the past and pushed forward and tried to be happy with him. I needed to prove everyone wrong and she he was a different person. I should have thought more about myself.
***

It was senior year of high school. I strayed away from my usual group of girlfriends friends. I made new friends with two girls that were a little more crazy and fun. I started talking to this new boy. I wanted him so bad even though it was so wrong. He had dated one of my friends before and I knew he still talked to her yet I couldn't help myself. He was the first guy to give me so much attention and I loved it. I thought my year was going to be awesome with my new friends and this boy, but instead it back fired. He asked me to be his girlfriend and we started dating, but along with this new relationship came a loss of friendship with all my old friends because I had betrayed one of them. At the time it seemed worth it in my crazy teenage mind but but none of it was. My year got worse before it got better, and even when it got better I still could not forget the worst.
***
I wish I had known then what I know now.